I reflect on what went wrong during the past year. I reflect on what went great the past year. I reflect on what I wish I did more of and less of the past year. While I am reflecting, my emotions go on a rollercoaster ride which in itself, is stressful. When I become aware enough to take a step back and realize what I am needlessly doing to myself, I finally get to the point that I can begin my rejuvenation.
To me, rejuvenation means clearing my head of all things education. I need to purge my negative and positive stress from the school year. I need to cleanse myself of all things school. I wish I could say that this was easy for me, but having a heavily involved and invested teacher as a wife, and since my wife and I devote 24 hours a day to our students and school during the school year, it is a struggle to stop my teacher mind and find my own personal peace.
I celebrate this week, the official coming of my personal peace. I was able to sit in my back yard with complete silence with the exception the oversized poplar trees blowing in the cool wind which makes the sound of bacon frying (I'm a vegetarian, but I remember this sound).
This peace allowed me to reconnect with myself. This magic time for me was like one of those Magic Erasers that my wife uses to clean every stain on the planet. It erased the stress, the obsessive thinking and planning, the negatives and the positives. I was allowed to simply be. That is how I rejuvenate. I simply see and exist with an appreciation for the moment, in the moment.
I am reminded of a psychological therapeutic method of Mindfulness that comes directly from Zen Buddhism. I meditated within the moment recognizing only what is in front of me. What I see, what I hear, what I smell, what I feel.
I have noticed since, the school stuff and real life comes up all too often, but I am finding it more and more easy to become mindful as the days pass.
This is my rejuvenation. I am here and will appreciate it.
Mark
